A great quote by a priest I used to know was, “A good husband gives his wife what is good for her, not just what she thinks will make her happy.”
Ethan is one of those good husbands who recently insisted on something he knew would be best for me, even though I didn’t want it.
We live hundreds of miles from either of our families, and really don’t have any support/help network where we are. Outside of the occasional date night, maybe once every two to four months, we have our kids 24/7.
I am not playing a violin begging for sympathy because I know people who have it way worse than we do. However with spring and it’s usual chaos for teachers, Ethan hasn’t been home nearly as much and I’ve been so burned out.
For a while he has been saying he’d like me to get a sitter once a week, and I have *hated* this idea.
I hate spending money unnecessarily. I hate feeling like I can’t do it all. I hated the idea of a stranger coming into our home. I was very sure that Ethan was all wrong about hiring someone and insisted it wouldn’t make me happy.
But this sweet husband of mine persisted that he wanted me to have just a couple hours a week during the day where I could take a deep breath and relax.
I messaged a parent from his school who seems to know everyone and asked if she had any friends with a daughter with a flexible schedule, either a homeschooled teen or college student with daytime availability. She did indeed have someone in mind and introduced us to a lovely family. Their almost teenage daughter now comes once a week for two hours in the morning and plays with the girls.
She reads with them, makes block towers, lays out pretend picnics, and orchestrates fun loud games with the big bouncy ball. While they’re doing all of this I lay back in the bedroom and blog, catch up on emails, read books, pray, or ::gasp:: close my eyes!
These two hours are quickly becoming a cherished break that helps me recharge and not feel so burned out.
I make a point of getting the girls out the door first thing on Thursday for all of our grocery shopping, and then I know once our sitter leaves that I have the energy to tackle some pre-weekend cleaning that is so nice to have finished.
A house freshly stocked with groceries and a rested and refreshed mama on Thursday afternoons is such a delight. In fact, Fridays used to be my most tired, burned out days, and now they’re one of my favorites, having had a break the day before to rest and catch up.
I didn’t want to humble myself and accept this help, but am so glad that I have such a sweet husband who insisted on what I needed, not what I thought would make me happy.
He was right all along, and I am blessed indeed.
11 thoughts on “My Husband Saw I Needed Help”
I thought so too!
HI! I’ve just nominated you for the Mystery Blogger Award!
Thank you, Joy!
What a wonderful husband you have!
I am blessed for sure, Robin!
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I loved this! I, too, have found some of my husband’s suggestions to be just what I needed.
Yes, we need to listen to those hubbies!
Good for you! It’s dawning on me that we’re not acting very loving if we don’t let people love us. (And some people just want to love on us by helping us.)
That’s a great way to look at it!
So glad you are getting this much needed downtime! I have been learning recently that self care is not selfish. Quite the opposite in fact. We cannot do the important work God calls us to do when we run ourselves into the ground. Another idea to checkout for a break is quiet time. For me that means that the kids play independently in the backyard for an hour or two while the baby plays or sleeps in her crib, and I get a break. The website Power of Moms has good information on this concept if you are interested.